Jealous

I suppose I am a bit jealous

They say the grass is always greener on the other side. I suppose I have a bit of jealously in my  mental makeup. I am jealous of certain people that are more successful than me. I get jealous of celebrities. Some celebrities I see perfectly why they are wealthy and famous. Other celebrities, I have no idea why they are wealthy and famous. I get upset when I see the celebrity that I think has no special talents get million dollar deals. I have skills, why am I not at least successful? The content that I produce (my photography) is great! I have no idea why no one really recognizes it or recognizes me.

I am a bit of a slacker

I suppose my whole life, I have always  been a slacker and left situations that would get me ahead to forming “naturally”. I always felt that I could never “force” a situation into working out for myself and at times you had to sit back and let things form  by themselves. I thought having a good website with good photos would be key to getting exposure for my photography and my skills. I now know, I was wrong and I wasted decades on wishing. I should have been doing more legwork and getting out there into face to face situations in order to promote my photography.

I am too old now

I am 52,  not confident in my looks or social skills. This restricts me from branching out with my skills and photography. I simply am a 52 year old guy who sits in the basement computer room and writes his thoughts out on his personal blog/photography website. I have tried to branch out to art and photo galleries but it is hard as an outsider to get accepted into a clique of people at a gallery.